It’s a couple of days before Xmas, well more than a couple, but it seems close. So close the annoyance register has peaked at a rabid fever pitch. What the hoot is the reason for the shops to plaster Xmas decorations in October, broadcast inane and ridiculously inappropriate winter Xmas carols, which in my mind are very clumsy, poorly thought out and are blasting out unnecessarily wherever you go. Well, I have to go, I can’t stand it.
Where can I go ? if you are regular dear reader, you’ll remember a post ( 366 days ago ) about my embarrassing shorts and the Xmas street party in 2010? If they get their collective shit together and want to do it again this year, i’ll have to consider hiding in my house and not going out. Not for a month at least.
It’s not that the neighbours are that bad, it’s just that they are slightly less than interesting. Some of their children are just four feet tall of rowdy chaos and somewhat unruly. I’ve two collections of ankle bitters about the place and I can’t really and clearly identify them here at tbaoo, i.e. who is who or which is which ( in case they have found me online ), but you’ll just have to think that both are as bad as each other. Note. if you are reading this dear parents, please control your rambunctious juveniles.
So Xmas. The local government and news has concluded it’s alarmingly tedious Xmas lights competition and announced a winner. Big truck’n bits. The lucky thing for me is that no-one in our street has fallen ill and participated in this folly. The sad contestants have eye ball piercing lights, above mentioned music and no regard for the peace and tranquility of the affected neighbours.
The local bus company do drive by tours of all the participant’s homes, along with somewhat desperate people who drive their cars and park all over the place, trample the crap out of the neighbour’s lovingly prepared and maintained gardens and shower the solitude of the area with gasps of joy and wonder.
Hell, I’d have to move or just set the front sprinklers on the happy souls. Please go home to your own house, or better still ( and much easier ) go the local major shopping centre and partake in their manipulative commercialisation of the festive season.
But and I stress a big bold butt – I really do hope you and your family enjoy the season and that you celebrate it any way you like, as long as you don’t celebrate it in my street. Good night.
